Saturday, July 31, 2010

My second doula client

I always get severe anxiety as a doula client gets closer to her due date. I always worry that it will happen at a time when I'm working, or when I don't have a babysitter, etc. I took a doula client recently and her due date was actually today. As you know we have been moving and I work full time so I was super worried she would go into labor at a bad time. I was totally prepared to call up my back up because I was sure I wouldn't be able to make it. However, I was wrong! :D

The night before last I was laying in bed about to go to sleep when I get a call from her husband saying that her water broke. About half hour later or so he texted me and told me to meet them at the hospital. I was really tired, but MAN I was relieved because they could not have picked a better time! Nate was with Granny, I didn't have to work, it was great!! Yeah sure I'm not a huge fan of staying up all night, but this kind of job makes it totally worth it!

After the anxiety I went through with my first client (who also went into labor at a convenient time) I thought that maybe I didn't want to do the whole doula thing until life settles down a bit. Now I think once I start working part time I'm definitely going to pick up and do some more (if I can get some clients that is). It is super rewarding and it's really quite and easy job if you ask me :D.

I have to tell you though that I'm so grateful that both of my clients went natural. Both of them had previous babies with epidurals and both of them asked for one. It is so hard when they do because you wonder "do I try to talk her out of it?" But it's funny because with both of them, you just try to help them until it gets to a point where they can't have one! That's when women really amaze me because they know they can't have one, so they know they have to do it! It's so crazy! AAH I love it!

Wednesday, July 28, 2010


It's always so bittersweet when Nate goes to Granny's for a few days. This is a really good time for her to take him because I can finish cleaning the old apartment and unpacking this one (we had two weeks to move out so we are still in the process of moving). And I can also pick up some extra hours at work in the morning on Friday. But when my little guy goes away, although I know he's having fun, I just miss him like crazy!

Phil said that when he put Nate in her car she immediately put food, books and toys on his lap! Haha! So prepared! That's why I don't worry about him while he's gone cause I'm sure she's giving him lots and lots (and LOTS) of attention and love and she's also super over protective so I know he's safe. He also needs some extra love and attention right now because of us moving I think it's been a little rough on him and I've noticed he's been a little whinier than usual. I just miss him so much!!!! And it's only been four hours!

Every morning lately he's been coming into our room and crawling into bed with us. He never really did that at our old place, I think he's just still getting used to this one. On top of the fact that he has a new room, he also has a new bed, so I think he's just adjusting. Honestly, Phil and I love it. It's so nice to just turn over and hold him for a little bit! I'm gonna miss that for the next few days! And hearing him sing all his little songs and coming up to me and saying "oh no swiper fox!!"

As you can see, us letting Granny take him is doing her a favor, she's not doing us a favor. I mean it's nice to get stuff done, but she knows that it's us letting her borrow him, not her giving us a break. She thanks me every time for letting her borrow him. And who knows, this might be the last time she does it without Audrey in the picture (Audrey won't be staying with her until she's a year or so. That's when Nate started staying with her). She gets lonely down there so it's really good for her. And I can't really blame her for wanting to. He is freaking awesome! :D


I just have to vent for a quick second about something.


Yes, I'll admit, I'm totally for universal healthcare especially after what I saw today.

NOTE: THIS IS NOT A DEBATE ABOUT HEALTHCARE! I really don't want to hear anything about universal healthcare, I'm just venting about insurance not trying to make an argument. (I don't like arguing about politics. If there is such an argument, I will not post your comment :D fair warning :D). I only said that comment about universal healthcare lightly haha!

Anyway right now I'm working full time. At first I didn't really want to, but then when the opportunity to switch to part time came around, I decided not to in case anything happened with Audrey and I ended up in the hospital. If I work part time then I'd have to pay more for benefits. It was the same story when I worked at the hospital too. So now I'm stuck working full time until January (granted I do get some time off for Maternity leave). It's really stressful working full time because I get a crappy schedule to work around and I have to trade 9 hours a week. So I want to work part time so that I can just pick up extra hours after I get the schedule I need.

So we thought about switching to Phil's insurance since he works full time. That is until I saw how much it was! It was literally a WHOPPING 600 DOLLARS a month!!!!! I could NOT believe it! Who here agrees that the cost of insurance should be a percentage of your pay? How could they pay one person say $10 an hour and another person $20 and have them pay the same amount for insurance! It is absolutely OUTRAGEOUS! $600 is basically rent! Holy freaking crap who would seriously pay that much for insurance?? The ONLY way it would even come close to being worth it is if you actually had to go to the doctor so much that it cost over 7200 for the whole year....and that isn't even counting the deductible, percentage covered, or out of pocket max! I'm sure that it would be worth it for someone who has a terminal illness, or if your whole family was in a car accident...or if you had to go to the doctor like 500 times a month...which I'm sure some people do, but still! That is so completely outrageous! I am seriously blown away that to get covered for medical care for our entire family we'd have to pay that much. Right now we pay maybe a little over $150 a month.

So here is my conclusion and tell me if I'm crazy. The only doctor appointments we really need to go to are well baby checks, and my maternity (which I pay for out of pocket anyway). And after Audrey is born, we'll just have more well baby checks and the occasional sick visits. I am definitely switching to a high deductible plan because if we save money for an emergency instead of paying a ridiculous amount for health insurance, at least we can use the money for something else and not just throw it all away.

I'm just disgusted with the fact that for one thing his work doesn't even offer any other plan, and that they would expect so much just for us to be covered. It costs Phil $50 a month to have it by himself. So why they think it is acceptable to charge the rest of his family $160 a month PER PERSON is just insane if you ask me!!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Un-Private for a while

I've decided to take my blog off private for a little while. :D If I do make it private, all the same readers are there so I don't have to get email addresses again.

I just have to say how much I LOVE our new apartment! Or townhouse...whatever you call it! The perks I've already seen:
1-no smoke blowing up or around us.
2-no loud neighbors! I haven't even heard them! I think one time I did, but it wasn't a big deal. The worst kind of noise to hear from the neighbors is footsteps upstairs and bass from music. We have none of that here, but loads of it over there.
3-warmer swimming pool
4-the layout of these apartments makes SOOOOOO MUCH more sense than our old one! The road goes around all of the apartments and it's just grassy in the middle with the playground and swimming pool. In other words, we don't have to cross any streets to get to the swimming pool or playground. I love it too because out our front door is just a sidewalk and grassy area for Nate to play on. Then there is a nice little picnic table under the shade of this big tree. I always hated it before because we were RIGHT by one of the entrances so I would have a heart attack every time we'd walk out to the car because cars would just whip in and out all of the time! Sometimes Nate would just run out in the street too. And to get to the playground or swimmng pool, we'd have to walk across a billion streets. It was quite awful. The other perk is that our new place has speed bumps so people don't drive as fast, but we don't have to cross any streets to get to our car anyway! At all!!! It's beautiful!
5-we're on the end apartment so it's brighter and happier because more light comes in!
6-we have a microwave that is built in above our stove! Definitely a huge perk when you've lived a year without a microwave!!!!!
7-the garbage dumpster is a LOT closer! It's a pain in the butt to drag a heavy bag of garbage a mile away!

Needless to say we're happy (at least I'm happy) to get out of the old place! I can see us staying here a while!

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Excited to meet my little girl! :D

I'm getting more and more excited to bring another baby into this world! I think now that we know where we are going to live and I can picture what life is going to be like with her, I'm getting more excited! She's kicking like crazy right now so she must know I'm excited to meet her! :D My belly is popping like popcorn right now! I can see it!!

I just want everyone to know how grateful I am for this pregnancy! I have loved every single second of it and have had absolutely nothing to complain about. I'm sure I could think of a billion reasons to complain, but since I know what a blessing she is, I never have the desire to look at those things! I look at them more as the sacrifices that make me love her more because the harder the things that you do for the ones you love are, the more it makes you love them!

I am seriously blown away that at 25 weeks I can already feel her little feet pushing up and I can push them back! It's so crazy to me!! I guess I don't remember what it was like with Nate since it was over 2 years ago, but I guess I thought that doing that came later!

It all seems so surreal to me right now! I haven't put NEAR as much thought into this pregnancy as I did with Nate. With him, I thought about it every second of every day and read all of the books and talked about it every single day. This time I haven't been reading the books because I already know what they say and I am so preoccupied with cherishing my last few months with just my Natey that I feel like the time is just whisping by! I haven't even been preparing for the birth. I have it set in my mind how it's going to go and now that we're moving into a new place and have decided to birth there, I am imagining where it is going to be. I guess I just assume that being in the water is going to make it much more comfortable and I'll figure out how to work through my labor, but I really need to start preparing! aah!

I don't know if all moms go through this, and I've heard my mom say that this is how she felt and I know it's also how my sister felt so maybe it is common, but I was SURE I wouldn't feel like this because I knew it was coming, but I do...I'm getting really nervous about loving her as much as I love Nate. I think that's why in all of my dreams I don't like her very much and she's always really ugly. I think more than that is that I am SOOOOO worried that Nate is going to feel less loved. Like I only have a certain amount of love to give out and I'll have to share it between two kids. I almost cry sometimes because I love him so much and I don't want to have to share my attention with someone else. I want him to know that I love him just as much as his little sister! I don't want him to feel like she's taking something away from her. I'm hoping that he's young enough to not remember what it was like to be the only child. What if he doesn't like having a sister? What if he wishes she would go away? AGH! I think it's the biggest worry I have. I'm sure it won't really be like that when she's born, I don't know why it is such a big fear of mine! I just want Nate to still feel the same amount of love from me! He is SUCH an amazing kid! I just can't even express the love I have for him. Lately he hasn't been going to sleep when we put him to bed, so then I go in later to pray and sing with him again and he always falls asleep after that second time and he is just the most enjoyable little person during that second time! He sings SO cute along with me and just snuggles. Nothing makes me love him more! I'm glad too cause tonight we recorded his little voice again! We are totally going to cherish those recordings when he gets older! I love him SO much!

Alright I'm rambling now. It feels good to get that all out! I'm excited to have a newborn again and I'm excited to watch Nate interact with her! I've really loved being pregnant and I can't even express my gratitude for a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby! I don't deserve it, so I will just be grateful for it!

Friday, July 9, 2010

Musician in the making

Nate has been so much fun lately! He has his whiney days, but lately he's been just plain hilarious! Out of nowhere yesterday he started singing along with regular songs. By regular songs I mean songs that aren't ABC's, Twinkle Star, or Incy Spider (those are Nate's names for them).

I was listening to a song yesterday that I listen to frequently I guess. The reason being that it's on my mix cd in the car and I'm usually always in the mood for that song, but sometimes not in the mood for the other ones. Anyway he just started singing to it! I laughed SOOOOOOOOOOOO HARD!!!!! For one thing I think he added the word "fries" in there somewhere and today instead of singing "count on" he sang "count-nose".

Believe me I tried really hard to get a video of it, but any time I whip that stupid camera out all he wants to do is play with it and not perform (he's currently obsessed with taking pictures of himself. I think it might be the flash that he enjoys). However, we have a somewhat professional digital handheld recorder (yeah, not the most common thing to have laying around the house, but remember, I'm married to a musician). So I set that up while he was singing so he wouldn't notice it and got it on audio. Just wish I knew how to post it on here. Oh well.

Anyway to make up for the fact that I couldn't get a good video of him singing, I did get a video of him dancing to his favorite song! Every time this song comes on in the car, usually no matter his mood he will instantly start bobbing his head and waving his arms. It's his fave I guess. Haha! I've heard him sing some of the words too which is cute as always. So...enjoy! :D

It shows at the end what happens when I whip the camera out, that's what he ALWAYS does! haha! Also, right when I say "is this your favorite song?" what he says is "mommy, dance." Haha cause he wanted me to dance too. RGH he's so freaking adorable!