Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Tonight I went to Barnes and Noble with my friend Whitney to work on our math project together. She thought I was going straight to her house first and I thought we were meeting there so I got there and had to kill some time so I thought I'd read a breastfeeding book in hopes of some weaning tips. I picked up "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding" and went straight for the weaning section. I have been actively wanting to wean for over 6 months now. I originally thought "one year and if it's going well then maybe 18 months, but that's my stopping point". Well 18 months came and went and then I said "well, no longer than 2 years". A lady I know did a thesis on breastfeeding for her bachelors degree and discovered a study that said that in order for breastfeeding to really be effective in preventing breast cancer you have to do it for 2 years. So I justified doing it till at least 2 years because it made sense. Well now I'm one month over the two year mark and still don't know what the crap I'm doing! I've talked to other moms and tried to get tips. Most people who have weaned an older child said it was mostly up to the child not them. They talk about how their kids just stopped being interested. Well I'm far from that! Thats part of why I'm having such a hard time! She wants it constantly! Many people said to try to offer juice instead or food. Well I'll feed her and as soon as she's eaten a ton she still wants it! It seems like every time I sit down she takes the opportunity to come over and drive me crazy for it. Once she gets it in her head I canNOT change her mind! I try to be firm and tell her no and she never gives up. So I just do it. I know that she will leave me alone and go back to what she's doing if I just take 6 minutes (I timed it) of my time to get it over with.
So back to the point. I hoped the book would give me some good ideas on how to wean her, but instead it convinced me to not give up until she's ready. It talked about how each kid may actually need it until anywhere between age 2-7! I was shocked! It talked about the biological reasons why they need it and all these benefits that I do actually love. I'm almost a little mad at the book for making me want to keep doing it, but it reminded me of all the wonderful things breastfeeding is there for. It's an instant pain reliever (for the child), its an immune booster, it's a great tool to bargain with "if we can leave the park now you can have milk!" (you'd be surprised how well that one works!!!). The book also talked about how we quit well before the baby is ready in our culture. Everyone has their personal reasons for wanting to quit early and I'm not here to judge that (after all I only breast fed Nate for 8 months). But one big factor for wanting to quit (the biggest factor) is the fear of being judged by others. Breastfeeding opens up so much room for judgement! You're judged if you don't do it long enough and judged if you do it too long. But it was really sweet, my relief society president came over the other day and Audrey asked for it. I was really embarrassed and explained that because I work from home I've had a harder time getting her to wean and she goes "maybe she just needs it". It made me feel really good!
So now here I am still not knowing what to do and putting it off longer. I guess my hope I'm writing this is for people to understand where I'm coming from. After all we all are just doing what we think is best for our individual children. I just wish it was easier and that I had more support from my family in particular, but what can you do?
Monday, November 5, 2012
I'm exercising my right as an American...to not vote. Yep. I said it. Get out your pitchforks and come at me. But trust me, this is an informed decision, not just negligence. There are many reasons why:
- I don't buy into the propaganda that I have to vote in order to be a good citizen. That's all it is, propaganda.
- It doesn't feel like a right to me to have to choose between two choices. Yeah yeah there are other choices, but not really. As a mom I give my kids two choices as a way to guide them into making the decisions I really want them to make. To control them in a way. I'm not going to participate in this control. I don't believe that either choices are going to really do what's best for this country so I'm not going to choose the one I think is going to a slightly less terrible job.
- No matter how much denial I can be in, my vote doesn't even make the slightest difference in Utah. Not even a little itty bitty bit. Local elections? Definitely. And I'll admit I dropped the ball on that one. I have too much going on in my life right now to learn about the candidates. I hope that you all make good choices in that department and am willing to suffer the consequences of not voting local.
- I don't trust the government at all. I'm skeptical of every little thing they do. I really appreciate the benefits of a free education (college, not public schools), and programs like the fire department etc. But I don't believe any of them are really in it for our best interest. They can be bought out of any issue. For example, the only reason you have to buy booster seats for your kids is because of car seat company lobbyists. Crash tests don't prove they're any safer past a certain point.
- Government is way too big now, which is exactly the opposite of what the founding fathers wanted for us and I don't believe that any of them are actually going to make a change in that department. They all say that they will make government smaller, but they're in over their heads. It's just not gonna happen till it gets so big that it collapses. (This is more of a statement than a reason I'm not voting).
Friday, November 2, 2012
Unfortunately the hurricane hit our loved ones for real. The only family Phil has that doesn't live in New Jersey is his mom and his brother (ok he has two cousins that live in New England. Close enough). So everyone else was affected in some way or another. They all lost power at some point, had trees fall in their yards, and worst of all, his dad's apartment complex was covered in 1 foot of mud, then condemned and he now has 8 days to find a new place and move. Luckily, of all his family members, Neal and Teresa were the only ones displaced.
I'm truly overwhelmed with the compassion that JetBlue has for it's crew members! Not only with the people with damaged property in NY, but even the help they have provided us to allow Phil to fly out to New Jersey this week to help his dad. I have a lot of gratitude and am really proud to work for such an amazing company! When I eventually become a nurse, I will always fly JetBlue! And I encourage everyone else too. They really are the best airline!!!!
Anyway, just to give some perspective, here are some pictures to show how close to home this hurricane really it us: